Yeah I love them. But today, they’re being douchebags.
Miss 4 and Mr 2.5 have been at each other’s throats from the second they’ve woken up. Screaming at each other, clawing at each other’s faces and just arguing about EVERYTHING. Then comes the crying and then the whining.
They’ve fought over rocks, over toes touching the other’s bed, over the cubby house, over the train, a doll, lunch, the laundry basket, the bikes, their personal space etc
“Muuuuuuuuuuuum, he’s not shaaaaaaaring…”
“Well, you don’t share with him so WHY DOES HE HAVE TO SHARE WITH YOU????”
Positive thoughts. Breathe. Be positive. Positive parenting. Buddha. Dalai Lama. Maggie Dent. Happy place. Meadows. Smile. Breathe. Count to ten. No, count to twenty.
“THAT IS ENOUGH!!!!! STOP FIGHTIIIIIIIING!!!!!”
Of course they both start crying because I’m screaming. Like I’m the biggest bitch in the world. Oh yeah, I’m the bitch, I’m the horrible witch you read about in your books. I’m your worst nightmare.
YOU TWO, ARE JUST A COUPLE OF DOUCHEBAGS.